Loving-Kindness
The loving-kindness exercise was interesting. It started out asking me to focus my attention on a loved one. I particularly appreciated the chance to focus on a loved one that was suffering. I think it is important to have empathy for others. It is not always easy for me to express love and empathy in person, so having a time set aside to relax and focus on others in comfort and privacy was an amazing opportunity. I'll admit, I did struggle some trying to choose a circle of strangers to focus on. The last one was by far the toughest. We were suppose to focus on all individuals, even ones we considered enemies. For me, there was only one image here....my mother-in-law. Because of the stress she has caused me in the past, she's one of those people I have had to let go. I did not want to expose myself or my children to the drama, lies, and negative habits that she is so well known for. Being able to express loving-kindness to people I consider enemies is going to take time and practice. I would recommend this exercise to others because loving kindness is a necessary step towards human flourishing and its a great opportunity to reflect on areas or people you may need to put more effort into.
The concept of "mental workout" is that our minds need exercise too. Just like when we want to increase our physical health, we have to exercise. And its not enough to just exercise once or twice. Its a daily commitment. It takes time to see change; to see the progress we've made. It is best to start off slowly, when implementing mental workouts so that you don't get stressed or discouraged. Start with 10 minutes a day, at a time that is convenient, comfortable, and quiet. If it helps, schedule it, like you would a hair appointment or lunch date. Commit to it.
Becky,
ReplyDeleteI agree that the exercise was relaxing and was a great opportunity to focus on a loved one who is suffering. My friend just lost a family member and I was able to send positive thoughts her way. I also found it tough to focus on strangers and enemies. Just the thought of some people brought negative images to my mind. It will definitely take practice to master that aspect of the exercise. I did enjoy the amazing feeling of comfort from focusing on someone that I truly love. I am going to attempt to do this much of the exercise every day to start on my path towards human flourishing.
Teresa and Becky,
DeleteThe part I found most difficult was bringing that kindness to myself. When I attended to the parts that were disturbing in my own life, I could no longer concentrate. It appears as if I allowed anxiety to overcome the practice. However, when it came to strangers and enemies, I had no problems what-so-ever. I thought about the temperature outside and the cold weather sweeping the country. I thought of the homeless on the streets and wished them warmth and well-being. I thought of the elderly and hoped they had someone to check on them. I send positives out to those suffering from any time of ailment. It pains me more to see another suffer than it does myself. I know it is important to extend loving-kindness to myself so that I may freely send this to others, but this is something I continue to struggle with. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Thank you in advance! I wish both of you a wonderful week.
Great post! What a great reminder that we need to remember and then let go of our enemies. Like you, I have compassion for people but not so much on the empathy. I freeze when I need to show empathy and rather than fighting for it, I recoil and wait for someone else to take over. I also believe it's important to know your strengths and learn how to use the efficiently.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry to hear about your mother-in-law. It's sad how common that truly is. My heart goes out to you and your family.